Search Me

Psalm 139:23-24 Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.

I don't feel well today. I am sure you know the feeling. My head feels like a brick and I am stuffed up and hacking away every time I take a deep breath. Not sure when it started, but somehow I have gotten myself worn down again and I am paying the price for not taking better care of myself..... again. God knows what is going on with me and by His grace I will write this devotional this afternoon. Psalm 139 is a real beauty. It tells us how He knows and understands us.

The last two verses are a perfect prayer for us to say each day. When I was a teen I used to love to be clever with my answers and when asked if I knew something about anything I would sometimes retort, "Search Me!" It was my way of not answering and not responding and avoiding whatever I didn't want to talk about. Frankly, God is the only one I really want to be able to search me. He can handle it, whereas anyone else might be aghast at what my heart feels or my anxious thoughts would reveal. God knows me through and through and loves me still and all. A comforting thought, actually.

I am willing to have God see my offensive ways and deal with me. I often pray for Him to lead me in the everlasting ways, not the ways of this world but the eternal ways. Earlier in Psalm 139, David (nice to know he is the author of this one, because he is such a real guy) he shares that God created his inmost being and knit Him together in his mother's womb. Doesn't that mean that God values us in the womb, before we are born? Doesn't that mean that God himself is forming us before birth? We are a living soul at the time of conception. Living souls should be cherished and protected, particularly before birth when they have no voice.

I am so grateful to have been born with God already my Creator. Meeting Him as Savior is just all the more meaningful because He has known me from my conception, through me time in the womb and on to my birth and life. God wrote all the days of my life before I was even born. What a miracle. He has always known me and knows me now and will know me forever. He can search me because He knows His way around within me. He lives in me. I am so glad he judges the heart. He knows my weakness and my faith. My faults and my hopes. He can lead me because He knows where I came from, where I am and where I am going. He can search me anytime, know my heart, test me, know my anxious thoughts and deal with my offensiveness and keep leading me. I will follow Him. He knows where I am going and has my best interest in mind at all times. May His grace abound in me and you as we seek to fulfill His will.

In His Service, Pastor Fred

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